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A Georgia pastor and father of two who once confessed that sometimes “I don’t feel like God is hearing me” killed himself outside his home while his wife, kids and 800 member congregation waited for him to show up for church on Sunday.

Rev. Teddy Parker Jr., 42, of Bibb Mount Zion Baptist Church in Macon, Ga., was discovered by his wife, Larrinecia Parker, 38, in the driveway of their Warner Robins house with a “self-inflicted gunshot wound.”

Church officials have requested that the public respects their privacy at this time.”

Russell Rowland, a member of the church who employs the pastor’s brother at his landscaping business, stated that the pastor had sent his wife and two daughters to church ahead of him on Sunday morning and they were all waiting for him to show up with the morning’s message from God.

“When he didn’t show up they went looking for him,” said Rowland. “I’m very surprised because he didn’t preach that. He preached totally against it. It’s something that the congregation doesn’t really understand.”

Rowland explained that church members came together on Monday night and the mood was “solemn.”

“Everybody is just kind of stunned right now. I think a lot of people are just trying to understand why that happened. We’re just praying to the Lord for guidance on this,” he said.