Romans 3:23 says,
For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
Sis, Bro, yes, you may have made some mistakes in your life. Made some decisions that you knew weren’t good. Been around people that just weren’t good for you. But don’t let the enemy make you think that because of your shortcomings and bad decisions, you are too far from God to receive his grace. God is omnipresent, meaning He’s everywhere at the same time. So, you are NEVER too far for the hand of God to reach you and snatch you from the hand of the enemy. And don’t let “holy rollers” make you think that because they are saved, that makes them better than you. Not true! They are sinners saved by grace! We’re still wrapped in flesh so we’re still prone to sin. But thank God for his saving grace.
So I challenge you: No more self loathing. No more thinking you aren’t good enough. Get up. Dust yourself off. Remember WHO you are and WHOSE you are and start over. Start over as many times as you have to because He created you with a specific plan & purpose for your life.